Drowning On Dry Land

Goodbye, So Say We All

So, a proper update is coming soon (yeah, I don't believe me either), but mostly all I can squee/rant/jabber about is the Battlestar Galactica finale tonight.  I'm at about 90 minutes post time here on the Left Coast, and I can barely contain my Riverdance jig of joy.  

I admittedly came into this fandom late, but when I get obsessed with something, I go.all.the.way.

That said, I am so sorry to see this show end.  It is without a doubt one of the best pieces of episodic television ever done, and it may yet unseat West Wing as my all time fave - we'll see how the finale goes.

The plan is pizza, beer and bourbon - in just about the order to celebrate the night.

Mr. Moore: I raise an extremely fine toast of Buffalo Trace in your honor tonight.  Thanks for the ride.

Lastly, an amazing wallpaper that Grant over at LiveJournal :: Battlestar Blog created to send off our ship in style.

You took off without a word...

So. You're still here. And I am...clearly a flake.

By now you few dear readers might've noticed that I tend to quote movies a lot, and even more so with song lyrics. And so it is with the title of this installment, being one of my favorite Lucinda Williams songs ever.

Are you alright
I haven't seen you in a real long time
Are you alright
If you could give me some kind of sign

Are you sleeping through the night
Do you have someone to hold you tight
Do you have someone to hang out with
Do you have someone to hug and kiss you
hug and kiss you...

Are you alright?

The answer to that question is...complicated. I'm more productive on a work front and as a mom than ever, but that drowning feeling never leaves me entirely. That dissonance sounds louder than it has in a long while in my emotional life and marriage. I don't know how to articulate that more clearly, because it's not clear to me either.

The unfortunate by-product is that I have zero urge to write.

I'm working up a head of steam to get back in the groove and write more frequently, and it's coming back slowly.

I have lots to tell you about: more house projects that have actually been fun (gasp!) and their outcome; the slowest deck construction EVER that is thankfully (finally) finishing with spectacular results; Zoe's first Christmas at her Mimi's in Kentucky; Wicked at the Pantages in LA; my new lover Tivo and his untimely arrival in the middle of the WGA strike (but I love him passionately nonetheless!); an upcoming trip to the Yucatan and Billy Joel in a couple of weeks.

Yep, lots to update on. Why was I whining that I had no urge to write? Did I mention that my moods swing faster than Tarzan?

It takes 2 to make a thing go right....

Jesus, the last two months have been a blur. The good side of it has been that I've gotten a lot accomplished on the business front and on the house. So, good blur.

Before I jump into the recap of the Zerbert's birthday party, a couple of other hilarious things to report:

First, I agreed (was browbeaten?) into going with Hubs to his 20th high school reunion out in Palm Springs the last weekend of July. Oh my God, I thought I had wandered into a Whitesnake music video shoot - apparently big hair and spandex cocktail dresses are still du jour. I about died. A horrifying meal, completely inadequate bar and some of most atrocious music you've ever been unlucky enough to hear. I mean, the late 80's were ROCKIN...why resort to Tone-Loc? But for whatever else it was worth, it COMPLETELY reiterated why I have ZERO interest or desire to attend my own reunions. I found myself replaying scenes from Grosse Point Blank, and desperately hoping something that cool would happen.

The next day we attended his boss' wedding. These faux-social events that only involve work colleagues are always vaguely uncomfortable for me; I don't know any of these people and am somehow expected to make conversation? Oh well, it was a pretty day and the wine was good. Almost enough to take the sting out of having to wear a dress.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

So, the kidlet turned two at the beginning of the month. So far two is turning out to be everything everybody warned me about. That same beautiful easygoing child who used to sleep 12 solid hours every night, eat anything I put in front of her and take 3 hour naps has disintergrated into a hot whiny mess. Granted, there are enormous molars pushing up like daisies in the back of her jaw but I can only hope that my small Neandertal will evolve past this stage soon....or else I may end up medicated. Or a lush, take your pick.

We decided to throw her party at our house again this year, and again: BIG MISTAKE. Christ, what a debacle. No matter how simple you try to keep things, the logistics wind out of control and pretty soon it looks like a scene of Gymboree meets Animal House. But there are many MANY Blutos.

Despite the oodles and oodles of food and beer, the highlight was clearly the giant inflatable waterslide. However, it proved to be a bit intimidating to the younger set so we improvised something in their scale:

Despite being completely whooped the previous day, she managed to muster up enough energy to inventory and categorize her loot. She was quite pleased with her take.

More pics can be found here at my Flickr account.

Under the boardwalk, down by the sea

Just a couple of pics from Zerbert's Memorial Beach Day. She is clearly a water baby. Or a ditch digger, can't make up my mind.

Interview with a Vampire

For no other reason than it made me laugh today:

House to Home

Oh my GAWD, I am such a flake. I would like to make a really great excuse for my prolonged absence from this blog, like I was off saving the Cheerleader, or taking a trip to the Aman resort in Phuket. But alas, nothing like that. It’s wedding season, and that means business is in high gear. Couple that with ongoing remodeling on the house and Zoe’s raging playdate schedule, almost all of my time is spoken for. Almost.

The rest of the time I have been crushing on Hugh Laurie. Or more specifically, his character on House MD. I’ve been caught up in the wonderfully salacious world of fan fiction (forums where non-professionals write fiction based on the premise, plot and characters of various media – TV, film, books, manga, etc.) It’s a delicious world, and one that occupies me from 9 until bedtime, every night: my steady date.

But I have been able to pull myself away from reading the juicy smut long enough to contemplate a thought: I have a very specific type of man I’m attracted to, and I never even saw it coming.

You know the saying that every girl marries her daddy? Well, I thought I would be the one to dodge the cliché. My mom raised me alone, and apart from my maternal grandfather, there was never really any father role model to incorporate into my subconscious. The only possible influence I could see in there was a long relationship my mom had while I was in junior high and high school, wherein they lived together for a few years. But surely that’s not enough to inform my choice in mates, right?

Wrong, young grasshopper.

It occurred to me that House’s character typifies the exact man I am always attracted to, and ultimately end up with – wicked smart, verbally quick, manipulative, emotionally distant, mentally abusive, physically withholding. Let’s see, I’m running a virtual inventory of all the men in my life….check, check, check, check, check…double check.

Yeah, it’s official. I’m predictable. I should be a slam dunk on eHarmony.

Other than that, same old same old. As soon as I’m done beating iPhoto back into submission I’ll post some pics of Easter cuteness, ie my daughter who would rather pick and eat lemons off the tree than find candy filled eggs. I kid you not; as soon as she plucked it off the tree the sour fruit went straight into her mouth. Scary thing, her early preferences for bitter and sour vs. sweet. Who wants to take a bet as to what a scary portent this is for my future as a parent?

Portrait of the artist as a young girl.

Seriously. She is about two seconds away from cutting an ear.

Brownie points if you can name the movie which features that line.

Fast Faster Fastest

So I don't think I've written much (at all) about my weight struggles, and the epidemic proportions they've reached this year. I don't know how it happened, but somehow I'm heavier than I've ever been in my life, and this past year included eight months of nursing. She's thirteen months now. And I know I'm not the only one; my girlfriend J and I commiserate almost daily. Y seems to have her demons as well, but I give her many props because she it out there DOING IT, to the extent of beating down on some Bitchy Step Class Wimmins. She is my hero - and practically neighbor! Hello, neighbor! *waves*

I take back part of that - I do know how some of it happened. I don't have a lot of time to cook, so we end up eating a lot of take out, and I usually eat very late - certainly not the recommended two to three hours before going to bed. And I always put exercise last - dishes need loading, laundry needs folded, calls need to be made, floors need vacuuming, andandandand....

And the last part...well, Joy said it very succinctly when she said that 'metabolism over 30 sucks'. No doubt.

I have every good intention in the world - I buy the right things at the market, I cook healthy meals for Z....hell, I have a gym in my house. No plausible excuse. But yet, I can't seem to get that first step in.

What I really need is a jumpstart, a kick in the ass to get me started and get some momentum rolling. (Especially as I'm gonna have to pour my ass into a swimsuit in four months). So I'm considering doing a Master Cleanse, not only as a detoxifying measure but also that jumpstart into losing weight. I've never done any kind of fasting before (unless you count the summer of '97 when I subsisted on beer, butter shots and the occasional slice), and I'm nervous and not at all sure I can do this. The aforementioned Joy completed a 17 day fast last month, and overall had a good experience, with good results. I know of a few other folks who have done similar types of cleanse/fasting for a variety of reasons, and all felt good about it on several levels - spiritually, bodily, mentally.

What do you all think? Has anybody gone here? If so, what were you experiences? I'd love to hear from you.

Hotter than the face of the sun

These clouds, they taunt with their come-hither promises of rain.

Later, the moon - she burns.

We shall melt before this is over.

Believe it or not, that moon shot isn't photoshopped - no color correction. Spooky!

FIRE! Fire on the mountain....

So flooring and other projects trudge on - yesterday the husband unit and I picked up the granite order for our hearth refacing, and it is gorgeous. Can't wait to see the finished fireplace.

But in other more pressing news, along with the other raging fires in Southern California right now, a 500+ blaze started Friday night not a quarter mile from my house. The crews got it contained fairly quickly, but HOT DAMN you gotta love the timing...I told Michael that OF COURSE our house would burn down in the middle of a major reno.

http://www.sbsun.com/ci_4058111

Bonus points to whoever can name that tune...